


A Change of Heart

by homeybee



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Character Study, Gen, Good Severus Snape, Pre-Harry Potter and the Philosopher's Stone, Snape decides to be a good person, Snape makes some potions and goes to the muggle farmer's market for his soul, Sort of? - Freeform, he also has chickens and a nice garden, more of a what-would've-happened-if-snape-didn't-just-mope-and-be-mean-after-lily's-death-study
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-05
Updated: 2020-02-06
Packaged: 2020-02-26 10:20:07
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 5,316
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18715063
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/homeybee/pseuds/homeybee
Summary: After the death of Lily Potter, Severus Snape comes to the realization that he has made a lot of mistakes in his life. Most of these mistakes have added up into him becoming quite a bad person, and he begrudgingly takes it upon himself to remedy that one step at a time.*also, i will be changing the title as soon as i think of something good.





	1. A Collection of Letters

**Author's Note:**

> I've had a version of this sitting around in a notebook at the bottom of one of my shelves, and decided to move it to a more permanent home where other people could also enjoy it. My uncle and I used to discuss Snape a lot, because my uncle was really interested in the similarities between Potions and cooking, as cooking is one of his more important hobbies. I know Snape was a pretty terrible person in the books, but I wanted to delve into the potential he once had-- and try to make him less of a horrible person. Enjoy!
> 
> I also basically rewrote this first chapter in hopes that it'll vibe a bit better with the canon of that time now.

Severus Snape sat at his writing desk nine days after the end of the world, staring blankly at a letter he had read already. There seemed no reason to do anything anymore, nothing to do anyway. Not for the Dark Lord, not for Lily. They were all gone now, somehow. Morning light flowed in through the big windows beside him, shadows of fluttering leaves dancing over the dark wood as if mocking him for his apathy.

The letter seemed to mock him also, the lines of Dumbledore’s smooth handwriting amused and cryptic. This was the most recent of several short pieces of correspondence they had exchanged in the past nine days. Snape, asking for advice, asking what Dumbledore planned for the future now, so many questions that boiled down to one thing. What is there to do now? He had been working against the Dark Lord for Lily’s sake, and now they were both gone, and he had failed everyone.

I suppose this is what I get for not picking sides properly, Severus thought grimly. There’s no winning so you just lose, twice.

 

Denial. Anger, grief, bargaining, acceptance. Those were the five stages of grief, but Severus hadn’t been able to feel anything other than an all-encompassing numbness since that day. Well, maybe longer than that, but to him and the rest of the wizarding world, it seemed as if the world had changed irreparably in those nine days, and everything before that had been nothing but a bad dream. Severus read the few lines of the letter again.

 

_Sometimes the best medicine for grief is simply moving on. Consider taking some time to think about what you truly want out of your life, and take steps to start that process. They say Slytherins have a knack for networking-- give it a try. If you find nothing, the position of Potions Master will be opening up this year at Hogwarts, and I would be honored if you would apply. Your skills are still quite well-renowned._

_Good Luck,_

_Albus_

 

Moving on. Onto what, though? He had never had a plan for what he would do after he left Hogwarts-- simply gone along with whatever plans his schoolmates had until he wound up a Death Eater, whether he had wanted it or not. At that point, it would have been more dangerous to leave. What did he want to do with his life? What would Lily have wanted him to do, if they had remained friends?

That would have been a very different path to take. She had always wanted him to be a better person, to break from his housemates-- something he had never had the courage to do. He sighed, and stood up, pushing the his chair back from the desk quietly. He had done enough horrible things in his life, and if he wanted to make up for it for Lily, he had better start now. In the end, it had been his own poor choices that led to Lily’s death.

 

Severus went down into his potions cellar, thinking. He busied himself in finishing the third step of a true-seeing potion, letting his thoughts take the back burner as he focused on maintaining the lowest simmer and adding the ingredients in fifty-eight second intervals.

After taking it off the heat and ensuring the cauldron would self-stir until he returned, he moved up to sit on the top stair, against the closed wooden door, and closed his eyes. The air was cool and earthy down here, and the faint clink of rustling jars and bubbling of simmering potions answered his breathing. He closed his eyes and allowed himself to think.

 

There was nothing to be done about what he had lost, he decided. Everything loomed heavy in his mind, but there was nothing to be done about it. Nothing but try to honor Lily’s memory. She had left a child, a child which had supposedly been left with Petunia for the purpose of preserving Lily’s final act-- preserving the love that would protect him from the Dark Lord so long as he remained in the home of her closest relatives.

Dumbledore had explained it to him when Severus had sent him a rather intense query as to how, _exactly_ , Petunia Dursley had occurred to him as a potential guardian for Lily’s only son. The woman hated magic, and would undoubtedly try to beat it out of him, or something equally absurd and cruel. Lily would have wanted her child to grow up in a better place than that. It was a pity she had named Black the boy’s godfather, seeing as he was in Azkaban. It seemed as if all the friends the Potters had were in no position to help the boy.

 

He allowed his mind to drift past the fate of Harry Potter, and towards his own. What would he do now? He had no friends and no family, no direction either. Perhaps he should take up Dumbledore on the Potions Master job. Or try for Defense Against the Dark Arts? He could hardly imagine himself teaching, though. Why did every element of his future seem to be tied up with children?

He sighed and opened his eyes. The first steps to clearing his conscience had materialized. He would do his best to contact those who Lily would have wanted to take part in raising her child, as well as Petunia Dursley, and do his best to take matters into his own hands. After all, if James Potter’s son was raised by Petunia Dursley, all hope of him ever becoming a decent person would be lost. With that thought, he returned to his writing desk and drafted his first letter.

 

 _Dear Petunia_

No, that wasn’t it. He crumpled the page.

 

_8-11-81_

_Petunia--_

_I am sure you recall me with the same distinct lack of fondness that I remember you. I know the only thing you would like worse than a letter from me is my appearance on your very doorstep-- so I am sure you will participate in my plan quite eagerly._

_I have recently become aware that the Potters’ son has been placed in your custody due to the nature of a protective spell cast on him by his mother. Recalling your complicated emotions over those with magic, I am sure you dislike this arrangement as much as any other reminders of the magical world, and I would take pleasure in offering you some small solace from this._

_The lineage-based protection on Lily’s son, Harry, will remain as long as he calls your house his home, even if he remains elsewhere for much of the time. My offer is thus: I will take Harry to live with me as often as you prefer, in order to teach him how to properly live in the wizarding world. It would be best to return him to your house before nightfall until he is old enough to understand the meaning of home, but we may correspond about that further at a later date. I will await your correspondence for one week._

_Regards,_

_Severus Snape_

 

The response came that very afternoon, by muggle mail. Severus smirked. That woman must be even more desperate to be rid of the child than he had expected.

 

_Take the brat as often as you like. If you must return him before nightfall, use one of your damn magic tricks to make sure I never have to see you anywhere near my house. If your or that boy ever do anything to threaten my family, I’ll call the police on you._

 

_Petunia Dursley_

 

Severus smirked at the threat. Call the police! As if the muggle police could do anything. He then proceeded to write two more letters.

 

The first was to update Dumbledore on the situation, which he sent off quickly and with less care for Dumbledore’s opinion than he usually included. This needed to be done, and if it was up to Severus to do it, then so be it.

 

The second was to inform his Gryphon-feather dealer that if he received juvenile feathers instead of fully developed ones one more time, he would use them to brew an antidote to paranoia, where they would corrupt the solution into a highly effective anxiety potion, and force feed the whole brew to him until he trembled himself into delirium.

 

Severus then paused, and a thought struck him that caused him to search through his belongings, opening a secret, locked drawer in the desk, to pull out a photograph, of the members of the Order of the Phoenix. How many were left? How many had been killed, or had gone insane, or. He stopped dead. Which one of them had been the Potters’ secret keeper, who gave them away?

Severus knew that Black had gone to prison for it, but that seemed strange. Black was so full of stupid righteousness that it seemed wholly improbable for him to have been in league with the Dark Lord-- and after all, wouldn’t Severus have known if he had been reporting to the Dark Lord, as had been claimed?

His eyes skimmed the faces in the photograph, which waved and smiled back at him despite his glower. Many of them had been clever enough to frame someone else, and some of them had even been ambitious enough to have done it. Not Black, not the Longbottoms, not Lupin...

As he looked over the faces, he began to list those who Lily might have trusted with the life of her family. In the end, he was left with only one who was alive, sane, free, and had been close enough to the Potters to bother contacting. No matter how much Severus had hated the man.

 

With a resigned huff, Severus began to draft a letter to Remus Lupin.

 

_8-11-81_

_Lupin,_

_I am probably the last person you were hoping or expecting to hear from. However, I have news which should interest you. Lily and James’s son, Harry, has recently been placed in my care, as well as that of his aunt Petunia. Petunia Dursley hates magic, her sister, and the boy as well._

 

_I have recently been considering my options, and have decided that I would like to try to live my life as Lily would have wanted me to before everything became so very complicated._

_I am writing to you for several reasons. Firstly, because I think that Lily would have wanted you to be involved in the raising of her child, as you were good friends with her and James._

 

_There is more to it than this, however. I have been considering the nature of the Potters’ deaths, and I have come to the conclusion that Sirius Black may not have had the role in their murder that he has been convicted for. Upon considering who may have been responsible, I have decided that you are the least likely to have framed him, or given up the Potters’ location to the Dark Lord, given how close you were to both the Potters and Black. If you have any additional knowledge of who their secret keeper was that night, I ask you to tell me. It is in our mutual interest to deduce who gave the Potters away that night._

 

_I would also like to apologize for any wrongs I have committed against you in the past, and extend a metaphorical olive branch to you in hopes that you may consider me an ally, if not a friend._

_Sincerely,_

 

_Severus Snape_

 

After sending it, Severus made an effort to unclench his jaw and breathe. However, the thought of Remus Lupin smugly reading his halting attempt to reconcile years of antagonism caused him to clench his fists, and his quill broke in two with a sharp _snap_.

He spat the mending spell, and realized that if this failed he would have to send more letters offering peace, and possibly even friendship, to those he now required as allies. The quill promptly splintered in his hand, and Severus mended it again somehow even more angrily, and retired outdoors to pull weeds in the garden.

 

Several minutes later, having taken out his infuriation of the few weeds that dared to poke their heads meekly from the earth of his precious gardens, Severus returned inside, feeling slightly more vindicated, not to mention a bit sweatier. He dropped the weeds just inside the charmed perimeter of the chicken coop, where his hens fussed and clucked excitedly as they tore into the pile of greens. After watching the chickens for a few minutes, Severus returned inside to work on something simpler. He picked up a well-worn notebook from the desk, and moved into the kitchen to experiment with and document the magical effects of coriander pods. He didn’t acknowledge it, but this was the ninth night he had failed to remember to make dinner.

 

...

 

The next morning, he awoke to the tapping of a beak on his windowsill. He admitted the owl, took the letter, and headed downstairs to read it. Severus had anticipated Dumbledore’s response to arrive first, but to his surprise, the letter that came early the next morning bore a different hand.

 

_Dear Severus,_

_To be frank, I never would have expected this as anything other than a practical joke. However, after reading your account of what happened that night, I feel inclined to believe you. Sirius would never have turned on his friends, but Peter was always easily manipulated by people who were stronger or more powerful than he was._

_I accept your apology wholeheartedly, and apologise in kind for ever insulting or harming you. I would like to meet in person, however, just to make sure that you are, as you say, sincere. Why don’t we meet for tea at the Leaky cauldron this Saturday around 4:00 in the afternoon?_

 

_Signed,_

_Remus Lupin_

 

Severus read it once, and then once more, more than a bit surprised at how generous the sentiment was. He supposed that out of any of those Gryffindor bastards, Lupin was the most forgiving.

He calculated, and decided that 4:00 pm gave him enough time to the farmer’s market first, which would put him in a pleasant enough mood to handle whatever experience tea with Lupin would be.

He considered for a moment writing his response on the back of this letter, but thought better of it and quickly wrote on a fresh piece of parchment:

 

_4:00 pm sounds fine, thank you._

_Severus Snape_

  
As he watched the owl fly away again, he felt an odd nervousness replace the numb feeling that had been following him. He hoped he was truly making the right decision.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! There will be more of this, so let me know if you liked it or if you noticed any mistakes. Next up: a trip to the farmer's market :)
> 
> Edits have been made! I hope y'all want a chapter two because it is coming. I guess it only takes having an AP exam tomorrow to convince me to write!


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Severus makes good on his arrangements.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It’s been awhile... I’ve had this in the works for awhile but someone from real life discovered this and I felt the need to lie very, very, low for awhile. But then I reread it and remembered that my Snape is good actually.

After watching his response sail off into the sky above Spinner’s End, Severus decided that today he would make good on his promise to  _ babysit _ Harry Potter, because if he did not, the insanity of the idea would catch up with him and he would never do it. He cast a disillusionment charm on himself, steeled himself, and apparated to Number 4, Privet Drive, where the muggle mail had originated from. He spent a moment considering the benefits of owl mail in that it doesn’t reveal one’s personal address to strangers. 

Looking up and down the street, he wondered for a moment how he would possibly be able to take the Potter boy without all the muggles suspecting him of being a kidnapper. It was then that he saw someone quite curious— the only other person on the entire street, her gait determinedly casual, as if just going for a morning stroll through the neighborhood. He crossed the street in a few loping strides, turning a corner and allowing the spell to drop before stepping back onto the sidewalk to intercept her. 

“Well. If it isn’t Severus Snape. I can’t say I expected to see you showing up in this neighborhood, but I’ve been seeing all sorts of people around here these past few days. How’s life been for you since it all ended?”

“Miss Figg.” Severus nodded at her. “I’m afraid I must ask you a favor. I  _ presume _ you are aware that Harry Potter now resides at this address?” He drawled, and shrugged towards the large, unassuming house. 

“Yes, I am. Although I can’t imagine what sort of business you would have with him, you never did strike me as one for babies.” Well. That seemed fairly apt, Severus thought.

“On the contrary. I promised  _ dear _ Petunia I would look after him so she doesn’t have to stand having a  _ magical person _ in her house all the time.”

Miss Figg looked rather taken aback. He continued. 

“Only, I’ve come to a bit of a problem, you see. She doesn’t want anyone of magical ilk anywhere near her house at all, including me, and we’ve yet to work out an arrangement of how I’m to pick him up to take him from her.”

 

Miss Figg looked as if there were several emotions causing her no small conflict right now. 

“Well…” She began, glancing over at the house. “I suppose if you can prove this to me, I could go get Harry for you myself.” Her face settled on a mistrustful glare. 

Severus smiled. “Oh, of course. That would be incredibly helpful, Arabella.” He pulled the piece of muggle mail from Petunia from his robes and passed it to Miss Figg for inspection. He watched as she read it, expression shifting from mistrust to anger. 

 

“Why, I never!” She looked angrily back and forth from Number 4, Privet Drive and Severus. “It sounds as if she doesn’t want the boy at all! And her being his only family!” 

“Oh, yes, I know.” Severus nodded seriously. “That is why I felt it necessary to make sure the boy has  _ other _ people involved in his upbringing as well.” 

 

“Well, that’s quite noble of you, Severus!” She suddenly smiled at him, and marched across the street to knock on the Dursleys’ front door. 

Severus replaced his disillusionment charm just in time for the door to open, revealing a heavyset, mustachioed man. He spoke to Miss Figg in a pompous, booming voice for a few moments, and invited her inside. Severus allowed himself some hope. She must be quite adept at talking to insufferable muggles, he thought. He, on the other hand, wanted to poison him.

A few minutes later, she returned alone, carrying a small bundle and grinning. She seemed to know he was still there, because she immediately started talking. 

 

“Oh, Severus, would you please let me help take care of him? He’s just so  _ small _ …” She began talking very fast. Severus interrupted her, hoping to limit the amount of simpering. 

“Actually, that would be very helpful. I was hoping to gather a small group of people to help…  _ parent _ the boy, for lack of a better word. If you’d like to, it’d be a great help.” He said a bit awkwardly. Thankfully, though, she seemed very excited over the prospect.

 

And so Severus had his first ally. He hadn’t expected it, but it was quite nice to know there were others who wanted to help as well. In an uncharacteristic gesture of thanks, he invited Miss Figg over for tea, but she declined graciously. 

“Actually, I have quite a lot of errands to run today. Thank you for the offer, though! And do let me take Harry when you can’t?” She pleaded.

“Yes, of course. Actually, could you possibly take him this weekend?” Severus asked her, remembering his meeting with Lupin. She agreed excitedly, and they went their separate ways.

 

...

 

In fact, Saturday snuck up much sooner than he had anticipated. Somehow, looking after a very very young child had a way of making the hours go by rather quickly. Severus found himself revitalizing an old walk-in closet he had been using for storage into a room suitable for keeping a baby in. He transformed an old crate (which had once held the sapling of the hawthorn tree which now grew in his yard) into a crib, and charmed a few floating butterflies for the boy to coo at. 

 

Severus had never looked after a child in his life, but the boy seemed quite content to watch him silently with wide, green eyes. Harry hardly cried, and seemed to enjoy it greatly when Severus took him outside into the garden, apparently being very curious about magical creatures that roamed outdoors. He also seemed to take great pleasure in crawling after the chickens in their magical enclosure, trying to grab their feathers. Thankfully, the chickens were quite a bit more agile than he was. 

Inside, Harry seemed oddly intrigued by cutlery, and Severus found he could offer him a few spoons to play with, and be able to ignore him enough to get his usual work done, the clattering and cheerful babbling informing him that the child was still safe. When the sun began to set, Severus would gather up the boy, apparate them both to the Dursleys’ house, knock twice and watch from afar as Harry was hurriedly gathered indoors. And at sunrise the next morning, Severus would be there to watch Harry be placed back on the doorstep as Petunia grabbed the mail. 

 

On Saturday morning, Severus even found that it felt odd not to retrieve Harry, even though it had only been two days. Somehow, it felt like his entire life had shifted. Instead, he collected the eggs from the henhouse, the honey from the beehive, and several of his most popular remedies and tinctures, to head to the local farmers market. 

Now Cokeworth was not the sort of town one would expect to have a farmers market, but one had existed there on Saturday mornings for at least as long as Severus had been alive. The vendors and customers were all muggles, but they appreciated fresh eggs and honey as well as anyone. 

Severus also had no qualms about selling a few potions there, as most were simple balms or remedies that mainly relied on ordinary herbs and simple science for their results, their magic simply being to increase their potency. Plus, the sort of muggles that used natural remedies these days weren’t exactly the sort that would be trusted if they started spouting tales about witches or wizards doing magic on them.

Severus felt odd as he sat underneath the tent of his booth. He hadn’t been to the farmers market in quite a few months now, and it was strange to be doing something so ordinary after his whole life had changed. Maybe it would be good for him, he mused. Lily would probably think so. 

 

That Saturday was quite misty, and only the usual crowd came, a group of mainly elderly people that Severus had been seeing here since he was a child, who didn’t talk too much, came for what they needed and left with a nod or a smile. It was pleasant, Severus realized bemusedly. He was not a fan of the sun, or of stupid people coming to gawk or chatter his ears off and not buy anything, like they sometimes did near the holidays. 

Another vendor even came to smile at him and tell him it was good to see him back. Severus nodded curtly at this, but gave him two extra honey sticks for the two daughters that he’d seen with him before. It was nice to return to something that had been a staple in his schedule before the war. Nice, even, to be recognised as nothing but another ordinary person. 

 

Around 3:30, he packed his booth up and returned to Spinner’s End. He quickly changed out of his muggle clothes and into a fresh set of robes, combed his hair, and glared at his reflection to put it in its place. 

He then apparated into the Leaky Cauldron, hoping to get there early and already be seated when Lupin arrived. He wanted to have every social advantage during this meeting, whatever it would be. 

The bustle of the pub assaulted his senses, and he glanced round the room uneasily, looking for an empty table. There were only a few, and as he approached one in the corner, he noticed a solitary man reading. 

The man, noticing his approach, looked up. It was the unmistakable countenance of Remus Lupin. Severus forced down a grimace, hoping his face remained pleasantly neutral, and smoothly took the seat across from him.

“Lupin,” Severus greeted him with a cordial nod. What did one say to an old enemy when they were trying to be friendly? 

“Snape. You’re rather more punctual than I expected,” Lupin looked him over. Severus tried to hide the fact that he knew they were both there more than twenty minutes early by glancing at his watch. 

“I thought it might be busy,” He answered awkwardly. Searching for another conversation topic, his eyes alighted on the book Lupin had been reading. He was pleasantly surprised to see a familiar cover. “Damocles? I didn’t realize you— ah. He recently came up with a fairly respectable anti-lycanthropic potion, didn’t he.” Severus realized this aloud, then glanced up, hoping he hadn’t horribly offended the man already. 

Lupin only nodded, and sighed. 

“It does work well— even better than I had hoped, really, but it’s quite the pain to brew. And it contains Wolfsbane, hence the name, which I’m half-worried might kill me if I dose myself with it every month.” He coughed. “Anyway. I must admit I was fairly surprised to get your letter, Snape, and even more surprised to see you here, making the effort to follow through.” Snape met his quizzical look with a rather impenetrable stare. Lupin continued, “Care to explain why you, er… reached out?”

 

Severus had hoped not to have to answer that immediately, but he supposed he would have to tell someone other than Dumbledore at some point, and it may as well be now. Plus, the emotional vulnerability it would involve would increase the chances of this meeting going well by a lot. 

He began, “You know I was friends with Lily… as a child.” He spoke slowly, picking his words carefully. “I often regretted my choice to become a Death Eater, even while I was still at Hogwarts. I was…  _ involved _ in the Dark Lord’s plot to kill the Potters, perhaps even the reason for it.” He admitted slowly, and immediately regretted it. 

Lupin’s eyebrows shot up, in a rather unfriendly way. Severus went on unflinchingly. He had started this, and he would go through with it.

“I begged him to have mercy, but it was impossible. He was convinced that it was their son Harry who would be the one to fulfill that prophecy…” Snape paused for a very long time there, and went on. “It was I who warned Dumbledore… and what followed was out of my control.” 

The eyebrows had come back down, but Lupin did not speak. He knew there was more, and listened intently. 

 

“I had no friends in those with the Dark Lord, or those opposed. I have, however, been involved in the Order of the Phoenix, as I know you also have. There are… a few more things, though, as you may recall from my letter.”

“As in, the situation with Harry?” Lupin looked truly intrigued now. “I am pretty curious about that. What made you decide to, er, take him under your wing? No offense, but you never really seemed like the, uh, type for kids.”

“Have you ever met Petunia Dursley?” Severus asked, and Lupin looked confused. 

“Uh, no?”

“She is… simply put, not the sort of person who I would have put a magical child in the care of. I don’t think she and Lily got along very well, even as adults. I wanted to make sure that Lily’s son was, at the very least, raised in a household that did not hate him and his magic.” Severus said seriously. 

Lupin gave him a sort of surprised half-smile, and said, “That’s oddly noble of you, Snape. I can’t say I would have expected that from you.”

 

Severus was unsure whether that was a compliment or not, and moved on instead of responding.

“The other thing I asked about in my letter. About Black. I’ve become increasingly sure that he is innocent, as much as I hate to admit it.” Severus spat.

Lupin set his jaw in response to his tone, but did not try to argue about the character of Sirius Black. 

“That… makes sense to me, but there were so many eyewitnesses. I don’t understand why  _ you _ would have any reason to doubt his sentence.”

“I have no love for Sirius Black,” Severus asserted. “It doesn’t seem like him, though. I was the Dark Lord’s right hand man, after I delivered him the prophecy. I would have known if someone was… If Black was giving him any sort of information. I would have expected someone like Sirius Black to die under the Dark Lord’s interrogation rather than give up his best friends.” Severus levelled Lupin with a very serious look. “So, if he had any sort of quarrel with the Potters before that night, that might change my opinion. Otherwise…” Severus trailed off, hoping the sentiment was clear. 

_ We need to start a new suspect list. _

Lupin was already shaking his head. “No, he hadn’t argued with them. It came out of nowhere, and the same with the thing with Peter.” 

“What  _ thing _ with Peter?” Severus asked.

“The confrontation? Where Sirius— blew him to bits with a single curse?” Lupin looked agonized even remembering. 

“Did you speak to him before he went to Azkaban? It seems as if everything we know about that night comes from hearsay.” Severus was frustrated, but did not let it show.

“Because three of them are dead!” Lupin shouted, eyes flashing. He took a deep breath in the deafening silence that followed, and when the chatter around them resumed, he spoke again. “Look, I appreciate that you’re trying to help, and I agree that it seems  _ weird _ that Sirius would give them up to Voldemort. It’s just that three of my best friends are dead and the fourth is in prison. It’s… somewhat of a sensitive subject.”

“Of course.” Severus bowed his head. 

“But..” Lupin spoke, looking contemplative. Severus watched somewhat warily. “I will write to Sirius. I’ll see what he has to say about that night— he didn’t get a chance to before, there wasn’t a trial. Maybe your hunch is correct.” Severus wrinkled his nose at the term  _ hunch _ , but nodded. 

“I look forward to hearing what he has to say.” He said honestly, and stood to go. This had gone about as well as he could have hoped.

“Wait, Severus!” Lupin said urgently.

Severus paused, raising an eyebrow at the use of his first name. “Yes?”

“Could I— could I come visit Harry sometime?” Lupin asked hesitantly.

Severus realized that he must have visited the child rather often before, and probably would never have gotten the chance to again if Harry had stayed with Petunia. He felt a strange mixture of fear and relief at the knowledge that Lupin was probably infinitely better with children than he was, but would be coming to his house. A werewolf would know where he lived, despite the disguises on Spinner’s End. 

Well, he supposed that he could always devise some way to update the wards to let him in conditionally. 

Realizing he hadn’t responded yet, Severus nodded curtly. “Yes, certainly. I would appreciate it— being wholly responsible for his upbringing is the last thing I want.”

Lupin gave him a curious look, but just said, “Great. I’ll send a letter to ask when I should stop by?”

“Yes, of course.” Severus nodded again, and Lupin rose, and they both disapparated to their respective homes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for reading! Please let me know if you notice any errors or if you enjoyed it!


End file.
